****************** BEN WEASEL SKATE REPORT ***************** ******************************************* BY BEN WEASEL ** REPULSE KAVA - 7" (Butt Rag Records) Appropriate label, this is a shitty sounding record from a shitty sounding band. 8th ROUTE ARMY - "Chernobyl Cookbook" LP (1 Dimensional Records) Clockwork Orange fans take note - the singer calls himself Johnny Zhivago. Unfortunately, that's the only thing worth noting about this disc. Most of the lyrics don't make sense, one of the few exceptions being "All Dead Radio," a tirade against commercial rock stations which would be much more effective if the band didn't sound like a cross between Greg Kihn and The Knack. WRECKING CREW - "Balance Of Terror" LP (Hawker) Christ, this is horrible! It's pretty obvious that whoever puts out these records is interested in "moving units: cause if good music were a factor (as opposed to a tough-sounding name and a marketable NY Mosh Crue attitude) shit like this would be back in some bald kid's parents' garage where it belongs. Metal mosh-o-rama with constipated Randy "Macho Man" Savage vocals. CRUCIAL YOUTH "The Posi Machine" (New Red Archives) The only straight edge band in the world. Ray 2Day is a festering sore on a meat-eating junkie bum's rotting pwnis compared to these straight & clean boys. Not content with pushing the obvious straight edge themes, Crucial Youth confronts the scene with commentary on issues such as proper dental hygiene and healthy eating habits, as well as stern warnings about the dangers of jay walking and masturbation. Hopefully, some of those other so-called "positive" bands will listen to this record and mend their ways. NO FOR AN ANSWER "A Thought Crusade" LP (Hawker) For kids who didn't make the school football team. Every song sounds like a Kermit/Fozzie Bear hybrid. Utterly ridiculous. What these guys need is some good dope. ********************** LIVE ********************************* GORILLA BISCUITS/SICK OF IT ALL/RAW DEAL/LAUGHING HYENAS/ SCREECHING WEASEL/SPONGE TUNNEL - U. of Conn at Storrs, 12-10-88 Never having seen a real live New York Straight Edge band before, I was tickled pink at the thought of sharing a bill with a couple of "the scene's" up and coming s.e. outfits. Spongetunnel and the Weasels played first and nobody gave a fuck. Laughing Hyenas put on a killer show, they were tight as hell and the singer (ex-Negative Approach) was screaming so loud that the p.a. exploded and sent 500 pounds of shredded sound equipment hurtling through the hall at the speed of light, disemboweling and castrating the 200+ crowd of crewcutted pipsqueaks. Actually, what really happened was about 20 people got into the band and the rest of the kiddies stood around and admired each others sweatshirts. Raw Deal from Boston came on and played fast music with slow mosh parts which the crowd adored. Sick Of It All were introduced by some gangbanger type and then their NBA coach singer came up and ordered the crowd to "get the fuck up here and mosh - NOW! We came all the way from New York!" (A grueling 2 hour ride in my estimation...we were there on tour from Chicago.) Needless to say, the crowd did what they were told and the band sucked mud. But we still walked away with a nice chunk of the nitwits' money. Oh, and Gorilla Biscuits never showed up, they couldn't find their drummer. Howzat for unity? X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X Another file downloaded from: The NIRVANAnet(tm) Seven & the Temple of the Screaming Electron Taipan Enigma 510/935-5845 Burn This Flag Zardoz 408/363-9766 realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510/527-1662 Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 801/278-2699 The New Dork Sublime Biffnix 415/864-DORK The Shrine Rif Raf 206/794-6674 Planet Mirth Simon Jester 510/786-6560 "Raw Data for Raw Nerves" X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X